It’s how you tell the story of your life

We live in a world where we’re constantly being watched. Every move, every action, every happy moment or sad is promptly advertised all over social media. We’ve ceased to be private beings and have become show puppets, always being criticised, evaluated, envied, pitied or just typecast. I’m not saying it’s a bad thing, but it is the world as it is now. We go on a holiday with a few, but end up sharing it with hundreds. We recognise people from social media, as intimately as we may know them, but we don’t. The world has opened up, but personal lives have shrunk. And in comparison with the hundreds of other personal lives we see on display at all times, it’s common to feel that yours is just average. And you begin to tell yourself the story of your own life tinted with a negative hue. Things that should matter pale in comparison with inane details. The world becomes a giant battleground for who is having the most fun.

But what bothers me most about this is not the comparison but the changing stories in my own mind. The details are changing, the standards of gratitude are falling and the characters are fleeting. And to me, that’s unacceptable. What matters most in life to me is the story we tell ourselves. Till we are living, we are living with ourselves, so the stories need to be ones of awe, wonderment, love and joy. We cannot begin to tweak those stories by the standards of others, we need to write them ourselves. We need to inject them with characters that don’t just take up space, they fill the void with love and happiness. We need to de-clutter the stories and be honest, talking about the ups and downs but at the crux of it be well in the know that we have it better than most. These stories are for you and you only. No one can take them from you and no one can wipe that smile from your face when you read yourself your story. No ‘comment’ or ‘like’ is needed for you to validate this story, because only you know the joy you deserve to feel and the life that has been uniquely created by you.

I believe, no matter how many stories we hear, how many characters we may have lost and characters that haven’t found their way into the script yet, how many times we have had to re-write, edit, delete paragraphs from our stories, we need to keep writing. It doesn’t matter who judges you, what matters is what you write for yourself. What matters is the story you tell yourself.


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